Paula + Halftime = The Death of Lo's Soul

Word on the street is that every one's favorite loony bin (right under Britney Spears) may be performing at the Super Bowl this year. She’s currently rehearsing a duet with Randy Jackson for the first single from his Music Club Vol. 1. The two would be joining Tom Petty who’s headlining the halftime show. SOURCE
Now I loves me some Paula. I really do. She’s a crazy old bat but I like her. I mean Rush, Rush brings me to tears every time I see the video. And Vibeology, well, its probably one of the most underrated songs of her career. But one thing I love more than Paula Abdul is the sacred game of football. And although Paula’s my home girl she IS NOT Superbowl caliber. Actually, neither is Tom Petty. (Notice how I didn’t mention Randy? Yea that’s to emphasize his lack of relevance.) I can’t let this travesty occur but I fear all we can do at this point is pray. (Lo lifts her eyes to the heavens and utters, “Jesus be with them for they know not what they do.”)